PantsWatch.com: When Procrastination Collides With My General Pantslessness

Since I wrote about my conversation with the Regina Police yesterday, people keep asking me if I'm wearing pants, so I took all the inquiries, combined them with my great mastery of procrastination, and gave birth to PantsWatch.com:



So, am I wearing pants? It's not bloody likely.

How the Regina Police Came to Know That I'm Not Wearing Any Pants

Our heroine, Schmutzie, fidgets nervously this morning, visibly shaken after a stranger tried unsuccessfully to enter her home through the back door.

SCHMUTZIE: I need to report a guy who was trying all the doors in my building. He's gone now, though.

POLICE: What happened?

SCHMUTZIE: At first I thought he was one of my neighbours, because we share a snow shovel that's just inside my back entry, but he tried my doorknob several times over about five minutes.

POLICE: What did he look like?

SCHMUTZIE: He was of average build, average weight, average height, brownish hair, dark hoodie. He looked like everyone. I didn't get to see his face.

POLICE: I'll send out a broadcast for your area, and we'll be in contact if we need any more information.

SCHMUTZIE: Thanks.

POLICE: You're welcome.

SCHMUTZIE: Oh! Wait!

POLICE: What can I help you with?

SCHMUTZIE: Will there be any officers stopping by or anything like that?

POLICE: It's not likely. Would you like them to?

SCHMUTZIE: No. I work from home, and I was just wondering if I should put on a pair of pants.

POLICE: ...

SCHMUTZIE: Hello?

POLICE: Pants?

SCHMUTZIE: Yes. Will I be needing pants?

POLICE: Um, you should be fine as you are.

SCHMUTZIE: Thank you!

----------------------------

And that is how the Regina Police came to know that, while I do not see fit to wear pants while I work or even while I am under threat of break and entry, I will consider putting on a pair to greet one of their officers.

I am nothing if not respectful.

5 Things That Made Me Really Happy This Week

Inspiring:

Casey Mullins' Ignite Evo 2012 talk about how to be and feel awesome at conferences is a good watch even if you're not going to any conferences. She gives good bossy finger.

Cute:

The Dog Bless You Holly's Half Dozen service puppy live cam will warm your little stone of a heart.

NSFW:

Also NSFW:

Gotcha!

79% of people don't know the opposite words for the following: #DontHate #ThisIsBrilliant twitter.com/schmutzie/stat…

— Elan Morgan (@schmutzie) July 19, 2012

----------------------------

Schmutzie.com's latest encourager:

Live It To The Full's Home Is A Hard Lesson online writing workshop will help you write "...the conflict between who you are and where you're from":

Based loosely on the concept of "every creative person has a complicated relationship with where they're from," participants will respond to a daily prompt designed to cause consideration, self-inquiry and discovery.

By the end of the four weeks, participants will have crafted and revised one complete personal essay that speaks to the concept of home as a place, a memory, a history and an essential part of who we are.

So, go check out Home Is A Hard Lesson online writing workshop. It's a great opportunity for life writers, journallers, and seekers alike.