The Bad, The Good, And Pants

Things That Are Bad:
1) There is a new bus driver on my morning bus to work. You see, the blind guy who gets off at the CNIB every morning had a deal with the old bus driver to be let off exactly in front of the railed path that leads to his work’s front door. That was good. This new bus driver seemed not to be thinking and did not pull up to the right spot. Instead, he stopped a few feet shy of the path, so when the blind guy got off the bus and tried to walk straight ahead down the path, he ran into a hedge. He avoided the hedge by turning a severe left, overshot the path, and ended up walking down the driveway (which does not lead to the front door), appearing disoriented and waving his cane back and forth in an agitated fashion as he tried to gain his bearings. Before the bus driver pulled away, I got out of my seat and asked if he would let me off to redirect the blind man, but the bus driver would not let me. He said, and I quote, “he’s just learning, They all learn eventually. Just leave him be.” No, he is not just learning, he has been working at the CNIB for years, and this morning it was, I kid you not, -47 degrees Celsius with the wind chill. I watched the blind guy out the bus window as we pulled away, hoping that he would find someplace warm in that desolate part of the city, and cursing the stupid, stupid bus driver who assumed that being blind meant you were “just learning” and should be left to your own devices. You tell that to the two fingers that poor man likely lost on his way to work this morning!
2) The young man who accused me of lying when I explained why his book was more costly than he thought it would be. His book was fourteen dollars more expensive than the originally quoted price. I gently explained that the original price quoted was just that, a quote, because a publisher may list one price but adjust it up or down depending on printing costs, demand, etc. He tried to insist that I charge him the cheaper price because of false advertising. Sorry, bub. That is not false advertising and ignorance is no excuse. What really cheesed me off is that after all that, he still bought the damn book.
3) The receding gum on one of my upper teeth is becoming problematic. I ate some dark chocolate at lunch, and it zinged the nerve on that tooth. It is too sad. Good things should not hurt so much. Dentists shouldn’t be so scary.
4) There is a “no kitties” rule in my apartment building. Other people in the building have openly flouted this rule. I know this, because whenever there has been a fire alarm, there is a suspiciously large number of cats being carried out of our no-cats building. I have managed to bring in a zebra finch and a rabbit without receiving the threat of eviction, but throwing in a cat on top of those two would probably be crossing the line. And I do love the kitties so much, I do. Oh, woe is me.
5) I drooled on the bus today, yes I did. I am not sure why this was happening. It didn’t just accidentally leak out of one side of my mouth like it happens when you are really, really tired and are at home in bed, but it leaked out of both sides, and because my face was so numb from the -47 degree cold snap, I didn’t feel it right away. Luckily, I was at the very front and was facing forward, so no one could have noticed it but me. Am I an 83-year-old Alzheimer’s patient, and I just don’t know it?

Things That Are Good:
1) The inside of the waistband on my new black pants is white, just like the waistbands of old men’s pants or men’s dress pants. I always wanted pants that had white material on the inside of the waistband. When I was little girl, I loved 40s and 50s-style men’s shoes and men’s clothes and the smell of men’s aftershave, and I really assumed for a long while that when I grew up I would be a man and get to have men’s things. I was very disappointed when I finally figured out that I would have to grow up into a woman and have to try to look pretty. Now, of course, I like this being-a-woman thing, I also like trying to look pretty. And on top of everything, I get to own pants with white inside the waistband. I feel so complete.
2) The Fiery One made hummus last night, and I am so, so grateful. I am eating it right now with salty tortilla chips, and it is satisfying something deep within me that I had not recognized until the presence of this hummus. Thank you, Mr. One.
3) I have learned how to make journals with properly sewn-in pages. The one I made last night is fabulous. I found an old record for fifty cents at my favourite music store, and the cover of the album screamed to be used for something. Obviously, it is now a journal cover. The record was “Mantovani Magic”, and the journal sports his lovely mug on the front and the song list on the back. Craftiness breeds happiness in my heart.
4) The Fiery One will not have to have an elbowectomy just yet. Over the weekend, his elbow swelled until it was a squishy, liquid filled mass, almost like a small breast had grown obscenely and absurdly there. He kept holding it close to me and trying to entice me to smell it, or love it, or fondle it. That part was bad. But now it is good, because the obscenity is gone. Also, the Fiery One is once again in the pink of health.
5) CBC Radio 3 is the best ever. I had forgotten about it but recently became reacquainted with it. Go there. Indulge. Love it.

Pants Facts and Links:
* Read a bizarre television script entitled “A Brief History of Pants”.
* “Waist overalls” was the traditional name for work pants, which is what the first jeans were called. Find more at Levi Strauss & Co.
* Nano-technology has moved into the world of pants! Pour coffee on them, grape juice, tomato paste – nothing can touch them.
* Why not read “The Camel Toe Report” while you’re at it.
* I may have stumbled on another fetish here, but you can buy your own Victorian, trousers, pants, and under drawers here.
* The New York State Epantsipation League “...is a non-profit organization devoted to the removal of pants from society through peaceful protest and intellectual debate.”
* There are yoga-specific pants. Why does yoga require special pants?
* There are movies called “Fancy Pants”, “Long Pants”, and “Pants on Fire”.
* Read some “Leg Chilling Abduction Stories”.
* BBCi has an article all about trousers and pants.

A Blind Saint, A Possible Career Change, Shoes, A Dating Jesus, A Bad Film, And Dominatrices

Okay, I know that I have brought this up before (September, #12), but the university students who wait at the bus stop outside the Canadian National Institute for the Blind really need to re-evaluate whether they have what it takes to make it to convocation. This happened several days ago, but it is really starting to bug me, and it is also beginning to make me think that the blind guy who gets off the bus at that stop is a saint. The other day, these students did not do their usual side-to-side shuffle, finding themselves unable to figure out how to move out of his path. No, they did not. Instead, they all piled onto the bus without even waiting for him to get off, which is completely rude considering that it is basically the same group of people every morning, and they all know that he has to get off the bus. Like me, maybe they were tired of their embarrassed shuffling and confusion, too, and maybe they decided as a herd to meet this problem head on and without proper reason. Maybe this is why, when the blind man stood up and turned to find the steps down, he bumped into a tall man backed by six or seven other people, who each pushed past him down that narrow bus aisle without so much as an "excuse me". The blind man is a saint, because while these nidgets were filing past him, he chuckled with the bus driver about having to wait.

I cut and dyed my hair, which is what I tend to do during times of stress (i.e. the Fiery One is away for a long period, fall depression, my bunny is a leg-biter, etc.). One of my co-workers told me that the shorter cut made me look sophisticated, while another told me that my haircut made me look like a dominatrix. Both comments were flattering, especially the dominatrix one. It is really quite pleasing to imagine myself looking all dark and demure, and I think riding crops are a far more useful accessory than those little evening bags. This could be a sign pointing to that career change I've been thinking of instigating. I hope the Fiery One doesn't mind late work hours and maybe tripping over ball gags accidentally left lying around. Oh, I'm such a kidder.

And, while I'm being such a kidder, I need these Angelic Flame Fluevogs in a size 8 for Christmas! I am sometimes a 7 1/2, but with a size 8, I would be assured a fit. Burgundy is best for the colour. Oh, ha ha ha. I'm not one for the advertising, but I am a huge fan of this man's shoes!

This is for all you desperate single people out there. Who knew that Jesus was European-American?

Way too much Milk Money. It has nothing to do with me, but it is still funny.

Dominatrix Facts and Links:
* I'm not sure why these are called "dominatrix shoes." I know that, technically, they help a woman "dominate" the rock face, but does that really make the rock face submissive?
* I am so glad that the City of Edinburgh Council is looking out for the public's safety.
* "The Matrix Reloaded" director, Larry Wachowski, left his wife of 15 years following an affair with a dominatrix.
* Safe domination follows strict rules that must be followed.
* If you are interested in dabbling, getting serious, or are just plain curious, pick up a copy of Sex Tips from a Dominatrix by Patricia Payne (apropos last name, I must say).
* I found this bit of text on this site:
Life will be enhanced through john lee love and online dating research through using sun loving couples and valentine one radar detector extensively and every day. Thought that dating transsexuals or interpersonal relationships were good ideas, then try free dating canada for greater results and satisfaction. How would you like to solve you irish dating or free romance ebooks problem, without getting involved with russian orgy and swingers clubs midlands. Learn facts you should know about square dance shoes and defiantly dating agency manchester, without risk. Though of trying swinger club maine or male singlets, our wisdom will shock you.
What in freaking hell does that mean? Whose brain writes like that?
* Go to "Hurt So Good" for all your bondage and S&M products. It is also good for curious kittens.
* These days, everyone and the kitchen sink have been writing memoirs, including Shawna Kenney.
* I have to say that this woman must be very effective at doing her job, because just reading her site has intimidated me.
*Angelina Jolie made her stage debut playing a German dominatrix in "Room Service".
* Mystress Angelique Serpent's essay, "For the Budding Domina", should help you understand some of the truth behind being a submissive.
*It looks like this blog is lapsed, but I was very happy to have come across a dominatrix's blog.

The Sighted, The Evil, A Good Film, And Traffic Signals

Yesterday, it became clear to me that the people who wait for the bus at the stop outside the Canadian National Institute for the Blind are developmentally challenged individuals. No, I am not cruelly referring to blind people waiting for the bus. These are sighted university students, and it is generally this same group waiting at this stop most mornings. There is a blind man who takes this bus every day, and he works at the CNIB. Every morning he descends the steps of the bus with his red and white cane held out in front of him, and every morning these same people just stand around directly in front of him looking uncomfortable, as though they don’t know what to do with themselves. I know what they should do – step aside. Let the man, who cannot see you, pass. It’s like they can’t tell where he’s going, but it’s obvious that he is going to the CNIB and will need to get to the path directly behind them that has the handy railing to lead him to the building. I think I’m going to create a tidy, little pamphlet entitled “How to Step Aside Out of a Blind Person’s Path,” and I’m going to go down to that bus stop early one of these mornings and hand it out. It will have instructions on how to identify a path tailored to the unique needs of the blind, and it will outline the protocol to follow when you find yourself standing dumbly in the middle of this path and a blind person is approaching you. Do not stand there, silently staring at his sunglasses, with that frozen look of an animal in headlights. Do not be that last silly girl who can never decide which way to go, right or left, and so is yet again left stuck in the middle of this man’s path, wondering what she’s gonna do now. For god’s sake, MOVE ASIDE.

Okay, now that that ranting is over with, on to how evil the Fiery One is (aka “The Palinode”). I was happily starting up my own little blog, figuring out HTML, all pleased with myself, and really enjoying that no one I knew was aware of this thing. I kind of liked the secretness of it all, because I would never have to worry about a thing I wrote. It felt like mischief. But the Fiery One thought he was all smart, linking to me on his site, and now I’ve been outted. I will live, I suppose, but his evil deeds will not soon be forgotten.

And speaking of the Fiery One, he has excellent taste in movies. Our local library has a good collection of DVDs, and he came home with a humdinger the other night - “Sunset Boulevard" – from 1950. I do recommend this film as a must-see. It is a fabulous mix of comedy and film noir. Also, because I always seem to notice the inconsequential background stuff, I loved it for the semaphore traffic signals at intersections. You only get to see them a couple of times, but they were delicious. As a result, I ended up googling traffic signals and lights, and there is whole webring devoted to them.

I'm not sure if this serves as footage for the development of a video game, or if it is considered a dramatic performance, but it's a good watch.

Take a look at this very strange monument in a strangely named town.

Traffic Signal Facts and Links:
* This is for those deeply moved by traffic cone preservation.
* I had not realized the aesthetic appeal of gas stations before, but some of these are truly magnificent.
* Even polypeptides need directions.
* Electrically powered incandescent traffic lights can cost $4, 450 US a year to operate because of the amount of energy they consume. LED traffic signals are proving more practical with energy savings of approximately 89%.
*A new traffic signal can cost anywhere from $70,000 to over $100,000 US, depending on the intersection. The components in the cabinet alone can cost from $8,000 to $10,000.
* There are more than 160, 000 traffic signals in the U.S. This number actually seems small to me, but we’ll go with it.
* Garret Augustus Morgan was the first to patent the traffic signal in the 1920s.
* The world's first electric traffic light signal was installed 75 years ago in Cleveland, Ohio at the intersection of Euclid Avenue and East 105th Street.