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I Knit To Stay Quit And You Get [insert inappropriate word that rhymes here]
Monday, September 28, 2009 What does Schmutzie do to keep from smoking for 20 days? She knits. A lot. Until her fingertips turn bright red and feel like they've been jackhammered by lilliputian construction workers.
Did you read that? TWENTY DAYS. I HAVE NOT SMOKED FOR TWENTY DAYS.
I wrote about quitting during the first week of it, at first waxing dramatic about how very hard it was not to chew my own fingers off, and then turning all hippi-love-and-oneness and talking about being true to myself. Since then, I've mostly veered away from the topic because 1) I didn't want both my blog and my Twitter feed to drone on ad nauseum about something I wasn't doing, and 2) my experience of quitting smoking got worse, and any lengthy discussion about it made me randomly hate whomever happened to be within my line of sight, which occasionally turned out to be the entire internet.
What? You are not a nicotine delivery system that I can light on fire and use to disable the cilia in my lungs? SCREW YOU.
Tomorrow will mark three weeks since I last had a cigarette, and although I would love to celebrate that event with half a package of my favourite Benson & Hedges Special Filter king size cigarettes, I can't, so I will likely end up eating junk food while watching rented movies and then knitting some more, because I've stocked up on some of my favourite yarn just to keep myself from thinking about my beloved Benson & Hedges Special Filter king size cigarettes, which will in turn make me think about the sweet Benson & Hedges Special Filter king size cigarettes that I am using the yarn to avoid, and pretty soon I will be apologizing to the Palinode for complaining about how I dropped a stitch, my coffee's gotten cold, the cat won't stop staring at me, and how this movie could have been better had the main character been played by less of a douchenozzle.
Apparently, after having been quit for 21 days, my acetylcholine receptor counts in my brain that up-regulated in response to nicotine's presence will have down-regulated, and my receptor binding will have returned to levels that are normally seen in the brains of non-smokers.
THAT MEANS NOTHING TO ME. If I could take these supposedly recovered acetylcholine receptors out of my head and see how much more sexy and attractive they are now that they aren't being bombarded by the evil poison nicotine, I might care, but, as it is, I will have just have me and my yarn and none of my darling and precious and dear Benson & Hedges Special Filter king size cigarettes.
Don't worry, though. I won't smoke. I'm just pissy about the fact that, after three weeks, I still find myself getting caught up in fantasies of rolling damp wads of cigarettes around in my mouth like they are chocolate lava cake.
Addiction doesn't have to make sense, people.
Anyway, the point to this entry, and it might surprise you, is that I have been knitting a lot, and the handwarmers featured here are my latest creation. They are my favourite pair to date, and, no, you can't have them. They are already spoken for and winging their way to an undisclosed location in the United States as I type this.
This post in brief: Despite its difficulty, I am still quit smoking, but, here, look at this beautiful thing I knit that you can't have. Na na na na na.
Reader Comments (23)
Congratulations! You are doing great. I wish I knew how to knit. It seems like such a great thing to do. I don't know if I have the patience for it. I wonder if I would be able to learn with my bum arm? Hmmm.
You go girl.
You're mean when you're smoke-free! Ah, but still awesome. Early congrats on 3 weeks!
A big big congratulations for lasting three weeks, and here's wishing you more! The knitting seems to be working for you, those hand warmers look wonderful :)
sooo...how CAN I get a pair of these lovely handwarmers?
You are much smarter than me. I opted to EAT instead of smoke. *sigh* That didn't produce as sexy results as your replacement does.
Good work...I understand the suckage.
Damn it, I read this whole post thinking "I want those hand warmers!" and then you tell me I can't have them. Boo.
However, three weeks. THREE WEEKS! You're so rockin' this quitting thing.
Ooooh! I like those ones even more. They are my colors. What yarn is that?
Keep on trucking or stitching or whatever you have to do to make it through. It is common for people to replace one addiction with another and I don't think knitting is such a bad one. ;-)
stay strong, little root!
So far you are a better woman than I. Keep knitting!
Melistress, the yarn I'm using most lately is Diamond Luxury Collection fine merino superwash wool. It has great colours, feels almost like cotton, and is easy to knit with.
go schmutzie go!!!!!
ps- i'll totally take a pair of those killer knit arm gloves you've got pictured, if you need to occupy yourself some more.
proud of you!!!!
Oh I love those! Go lady go!
so proud of you. rock on, lovely.
Three weeks means youŕe almost over the hump. It won't be long before you don't even think of it. Been there.
They are beautiful and you are awesome.
Congrats on staying quit for so long. That's absolutely something to be proud of.
You're amazing. Three weeks is an awesome achievement. Congratulations!
Whenever you're tempted to have a cigarette, just remind yourself that if you do have one, then you have to go through these miserable, stinky, sucky three weeks ALL OVER AGAIN. And no one wants that. So keep those three weeks as a wonderful achievement and keep on keepin' on. You're kicking ass and taking names.
Ooooh, you're over the very, very worst of it now! You are awesome! I'm a year and a half out from quitting now and unequivocally, those first three weeks were some of the worst of my life. Over the next two, it did get much, much easier. Congratulations on staying quit for this long!!
They are BEAUTIFUL!!! I love them. And SO stoked for you and your three weeks of not smoking!
Congrats! Keep it up! I know it's hard, I was a closet smoker (meaning I hid it from my parents and co-workers) for 4 years. I quit in January of this year. It sucked but it is so worth it!!!
I would have to agree that the three week mark is the beginning of the end of the hard part. congratlations
Good for you, it will be four weeks for me on Monday, and I keep dreaming these glamorous smoking dreams, then I wake up all angry at my self for smoking, then I realize it was only a dream and that pisses me off too. A girl can dream right?