This Website Is Five Years Old!
Monday, August 25, 2008 
In honour of the advanced age of this website, I am making a list of ten bloggers that I would invite to a dinner party to celebrate my blogular sticktoitiveness, thanks to an invite I received from Auds from Barking Mad. She's asked me to:
Create a post telling us who you are inviting and what about that person's writing makes you think they'd be an intriguing/funny/interesting person to share a meal with. What have you learned about these people through reading their blogs and what would you hope to learn about them through breaking bread with them?
Polly from Lesbian Dad: I was only going to include people that I have not met in person, but Polly is a must-have. At the BlogHer '08 conference in San Francisco, we both took part in a 22-person community keynote, and she read her weblog post called "Thanks Giving". The ensuing crush was instantaneous, and I found myself barely able to breathe when she later complimented me on my writing. She is a woman of depth and sincerity, and I can't help but believe that she would be a damn good conversationalist who would look more than a little hot by candlelight.
Blackbird from Say La Vee: There is a thoughtful simplicity about Blackbird's writing that feels soothing, yet she manages to make me chuckle on a regular basis. Over several years of reading her weblog, I have learned that less is often more, which I am sure I will be able to put into practice myself one of these days. Judging from her admirable aesthetic sense, I think I'd have to invite her over well before the dinner party began so that I could pick her brain for menu and table decoration ideas. She would help me pull the party together in a way that I never could.
Tamara from Awkwardly Social: Tamara is non-negotiable. She seems to have a good appetite for and taste in liquor, so I think I would need her there as a drinking partner to help me overcome my anxiety about having a dinner party in the first place, let alone one with such esteemed guests. After everyone had gone, I can imagine us climbing out onto the roof to drink under the stars and swap stories about our drug-addled youths.
Rekabek: Rekabek is just plain cool. I would appoint her the official photographer, because her photos have this carefully considered quality that I quite like. I do not know why I have this impression of her, but I think she might be one of those dinner guests who throws out seemingly unrelated sentences into the mix, which always helps to create a sense of levity and spontaneity to the proceedings.
Crissa from Total Constant Order: I followed her when she wrote a fictional weblog, and now I follow her at the new weblog she started following the publication of her book, "Total Constant Order"
Ainsley from Jerk Ethic: I suspect, from the snarky humour within her writing, that Ainsley would be the louder, smartass funnybone to the other guests' more thoughtful and less rambunctious personalities. My other, more selfish reason for inviting her would be my secret wish to absorb her talent osmotically. She is a gas to read and never falls flat. Ever.
Dana from My Gorgeous Somewhere: Dana's love of poetry is infectious, and it is largely because of her that I continue to pursue the craft myself. She would be the poet to immortalize this monumental dinner party by ode, villanelle, or dirty limerick, I am sure.
Black Hockey Jesus from The Wind in Your Vagina: Oh, Mr. Jesus with the wind in my vagina. I do find this man's writing entertaining. Whenever I read one of his posts, I find myself waiting for that moment when he finally slips over the line into true obscenity, but he rides it so finely. His somewhat crass humour tinged with human warmth would definitely go well with the roast, and I want to find out just how much of an issue having the word "vagina" in your weblog title is.
Scott from The Sartorialist: He is an obvious choice. Just by knowing that he was going to attend, everyone would be sure dress in their finest threads, and then we would all have the joy of looking at his impeccable outfit. I have spent hours gawking at the truly artful street fashion he documents in cities throughout Europe and North America, so he intimidates the hell out of me, but I could not turn down the opportunity to pick his brain about fashion and its cultural import.
Ozma from Hah!: Ozma's writing is smart and neurotic and naked in a rare way that I admire. She'd probably end up in the kitchen with Tamara and I at the end of the night drinking the last of the wine and laughing over nothing conversation like old friends, because that's how the three of us would survive the anxiety of a bizarre dinner party peopled with such amazing talent.
Who would you invite to your dinner party?
the memes, the metablogging
Reader Comments (27)
Congratulations! Those anniversaries are very special!
Congrats. You're catching up to my 6, but I'll be seven by the time you catch me, err, catch 6.
My 2nd one was last week, but I forgot. Oops.
As for your question, thinking up 10 would take too long that I have to contemplate right now!
Happy anniversary!
5 years in blog years is a big deal, so my deepest congratulations!
Happy 5th birthday, Schmutzie! I had to invite Polly, too. And I had a huge crush on her from the 1st second I met her, too. Which means we'll have to wrestle for her. And I'm totally okay with that. :)
Yaaay you!!!
Congratulations Schmutzie, on writing such a brilliant and wonderful blog.
I'm going to have to go through you wonderful list later today.
Meantime, here's a toast to you!
xo
Happy anniversary! I've been blogging for almost three years (of you count my defunct first blog) and it feels like forever.
Three and a half years here. I started on a whim and haven't stopped yet.
Happy Anniversary!
Five is a long time in this medium! Congratulations. You are an amazing writer and designer, and your version of navelgazing is a gift!
Congratulations, Schmutzie! Since I wasn't invited, I could read your palm long distance from the image you posted.
I'll bring some candles and flowers. We can go outside and smoke between courses.
I can't wait, though I will obsess over what to wear with Scott in attendance.
I'm honored.
Happy anniversary. Your writing stirs me every day.
Congrats on #5!
I've been blogging ever since it was called ONLINE JOURNALS. So, I"m going on seven excruciating years.
I started out doing it because the only person lurking was Joe's ex-wife and I liked to "stick it to her" daily.
Then I moved on.........
I know I'm not sophisticated enough to be considered as "guest material" for your party, but I would promise not to pick my nose at the table!
If I had a dinner party and had to invite ten bloggers, I would invite Jesus - he blogged our salvation. Of course, he wouldn't speak English, and the food would probably make him throw up, and our cutlery would confound him. And who knows, maybe he'd stab somebody.
You might not have invited me to the party, but I'd definitely crash it.
I can't believe you've been blogging for five years!!! Five years ago, I was without husband and children. That's insane! Now if we could find a way to travel back in time...
Happy 5th, Schmuts (may I call you schmuts?) I'm glad you're around.
I'm so honored to be included in your fantasy dinner party! I'll bring the Veuve Clicquot.
Happy Anniversary, lady!
Happy blogiversary!!
Wow, big congrats Schmutzie! You are an awesome writer and a keen observer of life; I always leave here awed. I have especially enjoyed your x365, and think it gives even more insight into who you are. Okay so I've been reading you for a year (from Ninjapoodles), so looks like I have some serious catching up on the first 4 years.
Hi, me again, kind of in the spirit of the occasion I did nominate you for an award over at my place. Hope that's okay! :)
Congrats!
I always thought that question: if you could have dinner with any dead person in the world, who would it be? was pretty great. But somehow being able to invite ten bloggers to dinner is even better!
All those people would certainly make me more anxious than I already always am, but a brain could live off memories like that for a long time.
Happy Anniversary!!!
You mean who would I invite if I didn't have COMPLETE fear of entertaining?
You, Dooce, The Gingerbreads from Weddingbee.. Um, Finslippy, Woulda Coulda Shoulda, Flotsam, My best friend Kate (who made ME start blogging) And Geri and Traci:)
A mix of big time and local, kind of :)
I'm just sure that I'll poison someone or they won't like what I cook or I'll BURN something. And HOLY HELL WHAT WILL I MAKE?
This is why I don't invite people over!
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
Oh dead god. I mean oh *dear* god.
I could never come to this dinner party. You and Palinode in the same place? Me there, too?
I would wilt. I would come undone. I would need a fainting chair and smelling salts. I would strap my bra on my head for the small comfort it would afford me.*
I would surely go into some kind of hysterics that would be misinterpreted as interpretive dance or a flashing light-induced seizure.
I would froth.
I would giggle uncontrollably and wet myself apologetically.
I would have to wear my red feather boa like a security blanket, but it would actually provide little in the way of security not to mention leaving all kinds of feathery bits in everyone’s foodstuff. The feathers would probably even make their way into that prized butter thing of yours, and then you would be none too happy with me.
The boa would, however, make me a hit with the cats.
What I am trying to say is: Sweet. I’ll be there. But please don’t serve anything sticky. (The feathers.) And also, be prepared to for a collaborative poetry game or two. (Sorry.)
What’s that, Schmutzie? I know. I know. I’m uninvited.
I get it.
*I don’t actually do this to comfort myself but I know someone who does.