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Thursday
Oct092008

A Picture Of A Man And His Gourd Goes Terribly Awry

The Palinode did not want me to post this one particular photo of him holding a gourd. I think that it's because he thought it was unflattering or something, so I am posting it anyway going to respect his wishes. We're going to have to get a bigger apartment to house all of these Spouse of the Year awards that I keep winning.

Of course, I asked if I could post the photograph he expressly requested that I keep off the internet if I stuck a rabbit head on top of his face. He said yes, so I did.

gourd 2


This picture was really supposed to be about that weird gourd he brought home, which I have yet to identify, but the rabbit-hat-wearing-lady-head kind of stole the show. If you take a good look at her eye makeup, it's kind of freaky.

I started to wonder if he should really be touching something when he doesn't know what it is or where it's from, so I gave him some rubber gloves.

gourd 3


He was suddenly starting to look like a confused drag queen, so I tried to balance him out with a championship wrestling belt...

gourd 4


...which left him looking kind of stupid, so I threw on an extra head to add some brains to the picture. The dashing moustachio was a last minute decision to add a bit of flair.

gourd 5


And then I got a little carried away and added two cat tails, a unicorn horn to the vestigial head, a frog tongue eating a fly and a halo to the rabbit-hat-wearing-lady-head, and an ever-so-tasteful background based on a photograph of a meat locker.

gourd 6


That's my bunny-eared, gourd-loving, vestigial horn-headed, lizard-tongued, two-tailed, germophobic, holy championship wrestler hanging out with a hell of a lot of meat. I sure hope that he likes me as much as I think he does, because I meant this all in the nicest possible way. Honest.

« Oh, The Places You'll Go! | Main | Opportunity In Crisis »

Reader Comments (17)

yep, you and your gourd are completely asunder from each other.

Thursday, October 9, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterflutter

That rabbit hat could come in handy on bad hair days.
ErinH

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That picture is a beautiful act of love. What man could fail to be touched by that portrait?

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJaywalker

I think I see the beginnings of next month's header.

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commentercatnip

Completely disturbing, yet oddly satisfying!

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterloren

fabulous.

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChurchPunkMom

That is classy!

:)

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDay Dreamer

Hot. HOT!

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDigits

It’s like a portrait of a fancy meat angel, patron saint of all omnivores. Most awesome!

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjan

The awesomest of the awesome.

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRee

You are very talented. I would never recognize that gourd if I saw it in a store.

Friday, October 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermonstergirlee

I think I love you.

Sunday, October 12, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah, Goon Squad Sarah

Wow, that's quite an evolution he endured.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Holmes

This officially makes my whole day. I LOVE this! There is nothing like going too too far to get all the way there.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008 | Unregistered Commentereaglecrowowl

Terribly awry. Terribly. Awry.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDana

best. thing. on the internet. ever.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteri am the diva

I stumbled over from Craftasrophe, and this post had me chuckling out loud!

Monday, January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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