A Proust-Induced Eye Injury
Monday, November 26, 2007 Proust Proust Proust Proust Proust, the Palinode said, from his hospital bed.
Are you talking about Proust again?, I asked.
Yes. Proust Proust Proust Proust. Proust, he said.
It may make me look like a troglodyte, but I am no fan of Proust. If he lived now, he would have had a therapist and come out of the closet already rather than written excessively precise narratives in which his love interests had feminized versions of male names.
After having weathered periodic Proust updates for MONTHS now, I said, Bloody hell, and rolled my eyes for added emphasis on the word hell.
Ow! Fuck! Ow ow ow! I yelled when the right side of my head was shot through with pain.
What's wrong? he asked.
My right eye hurts, I said.
A headache? he asked.
No, I rolled my eye too hard, I said.
It's true. You can hurt yourself with sarcasm. And it can take a week-and-a-half to heal.
I am a participant in NaBloPoMo.
Reader Comments (11)
Eye rolling injuries. I am scared now. For myself, my son, my husband. Hell, even my dog. We're all going to have eye sprains.
Ha! Have you seen Little Miss Sunshine? Every time I hear about Proust, I think of this movie. ;)
Proust is still on my never gonna read list. I feel comfortable with that.
I don't see your nice banana split on your footer anymore. Now I see "SCRAM"
*checking breath*
Whoa. I had no idea...
Oh dear. I had no idea.
Hoo! Wow that made me laugh. But I'm prone to really silly injuries so partly I'm just amazed that I've never sustained a sarcasm-related pulled eye. And now I'm curious about other similar injuries. Suggestive-comment eyebrow strain? Gross-face tongue spasm? Self-satisfied smirk sprain?
At least I get to be the foremost authority on Proust in the entire apartment. And that's counting the cats, the television and the chair in the hallway.
And might I add that I was not just saying the word Proust over and over again. I think I was updating you on the death of his grandmother. It takes 40 pages to happen, you know. And it goes by in many carefully delineated stages.
Or I may have been describing the narrator's plans for seducing Mme Stermaria. That takes a good fifteen pages to get through. And here's a spoiler for you: it doesn't happen. He doesn't get any.
lmfao - not literally - that would just be a bonus.
I suppose that Palinode reads Proust in French, otherwise it is unworthy.
Ha! I think I hurt myself laughing at this!