It Is Not About The Snail
Wednesday, June 13, 2007 If I start with the snail shell,
you will leave,
but I promise you,
it is not about the snail.
It is about that soft, wet,
not-quite snap of an empty shell
before full dark,
and how your small fingers
push just so, as you have done before,
along the top edge of the curve
where the light shone through in green and gold at noon,
and how it gives way without breaking through
to leave an uneven mosaic
of its once logarithmic spiral.
The water laps the sand into the fine threads it does each night
once the boats have gone to dock,
and the scrape from grit under your nails
is as loud as the shell snap,
is as loud as the high treble of an intake of breath,
is as loud as the sharp, cold zipper on your stomach.
The others have all gone for evening coffee and cards,
and all the crisp things surround you.
This breath is that shell,
your coat is an interloper,
the limp minnows
in the lines that define quiet water
lie in the same space where your shoes are not.
It is a tired light that dims the shell
and pimples the skin
that the wind beat with needles from dry trees;
breathing drowns the quiet
and nightfall the shell,
and you are left with a coat
which will lead you to a home
where clarity is attenuated
by the comfort of beds and things to sleep in.
Reader Comments (10)
beautifully written and melancholy.
Lovely specific details.
Really like
"to leave an uneven mosaic
of its once logarithmic spiral"
Very well crafted. Beautiful last stanza!
There seems to be a real contrast in this poem between the sharpness of being outside - the snail's shell, the sharp, cold zipper, scrape of grit under nails, high treble of an intake of breath, etc, and the ending where bed and clarity rests. There's so much stuff going on, sometimes I got lost following it's endless paths.
This is one of the best poems I've read online. You always amaze me.
And it isn't, is it? About the snail. The layers are many, the words enticing and the outcome is wonderful.
Liked this one, Schmutzie
I know I already commented on this one, but I read it again and I'm blown away again. You remind of the importance of writing when there is something to say, rather then just to see what I can come up with. You still amaze me.
A truly wonderful poem -- very well done!
Tiel Aisha Ansari and I, Mike McCulley, have created a 'poetry exchange' blog at http://totallyoptionalprompts.blogspot.com/" REL="nofollow">Totally Optional Prompts , and you are invited to participate.