Five Star Friday 238th Edition Is Brought to You By Saul Bellow

This week's Five Star Friday is brought to you by the power of female physical strength, an anniversary, the complicated tangle of ethics that is international adoption, a love of the sea, an alternative way of learning to mother, and Saul Bellow:


photo credit: MDCarchives

There is an immense, painful longing for a broader, more flexible, fuller, more coherent, more comprehensive account of what we human beings are, who we are and what this life is for.

     — Saul Bellow

Happy Friday!

"This Trendy 'Strong is the New Skinny' Thing (and what it could mean for the next generation of girls)" by Sophie at Sophieologie:

Almost every single food, diet, and gym commercial marked towards women stresses the importance of reducing calories and dropping pounds. Not a single one will ever mention the fact all women will look & feel healthier by gaining muscle mass & reducing body fat — an accomplishment that the hallowed bathroom scale will never reflect.

"16 Years" by Tanis Miller at TanisMiller.com:

When I see my husband now, I don't see the optimistic idealistic boy with big dreams and great hopes I once married. I see a gentle spirited, patient, intelligent man who wears the same look of sorrow in his eyes that I have. It's easy to miss his hurt because he hides it behind a big smile and an easy laugh. But it's there. I see it.

"Examining Adoption Ethics: Part One" by Jen Hatmaker at JenHatmaker.com:

Sometimes when you wave a $100 in front of someone, he or she will do anything to get it, even something knowingly harmful. Let’s stipulate that rich Americans flooding impoverished countries with millions of dollars to adopt its children will absolutely garner attention. Money has always been a magnet for corruption. While there are obviously lots of true orphans, without question, that much cash flow will generate some “created orphans” to satisfy demand, especially for babies.

"An Abrupt Course Change" by Tele Aadsen at Hooked:

We've seen other fish­er­men allow this kind of news to destroy them. For so many of us, our work is not a mere job. Releas­ing the dock lines, tilting our heads back to take a deep, salty breath, feeling our bodies become one with the sea and our vessels… We find ourselves whole out there, while we wander, incomplete, on land. Out there, we know ourselves in a way that, on land, we often aren't quite sure who we are or where we belong.

"On Mothering" by Vikki Reich at Up Popped a Fox:

Years later, when my mother had mellowed and we had reached our fragile peace, I mentioned that day and she said, "Yeah, you should have had stitches but I took care of it."

Mom, you tried to scotch tape my ass.", "Yeah, you should have had stitches but I took care of it."

She laughed and said, "Well, that probably wasn't one of my best moments."

Please come back and share good writing with us over the coming week to be featured on the next Five Star Friday. If you have read a really good piece on someone else's weblog, submit it by Thursday at midnight CST to have it featured on Five Star Friday.

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Five Star Friday's 237th Edition Is Brought to You By Claire Messud

This week's Five Star Friday is brought to you by a trip through depression, a nasty con game, a pretty damn good list, expanding yourself into a more beautiful life, a powerful little human, a call for a more inclusive Mother's Day, diet craziness, a happy discovery of pragmatic agnosticism, how a specific fictional character rose out of an author's experience, and Claire Messud:


photo credit: PalFest

To a degree, literary taste is a subjective matter. One can admire a work of fiction without particularly enjoying it; one can dislike a novel even while appreciating its value.

     — Claire Messud

Happy Friday!

"Depression Part Two" by Allie Brosh at Hyperbole and a Half:

At some point during this phase, I was crying on the kitchen floor for no reason. As was common practice during bouts of floor-crying, I was staring straight ahead at nothing in particular and feeling sort of weird about myself. Then, through the film of tears and nothingness, I spotted a tiny, shriveled piece of corn under the refrigerator.

"Not Just a Girl" by Jaime Moore at Jaime Moore Photography:

My daughter wasn't born into royalty, but she was born into a country where she can now vote, become a doctor, a pilot, an astronaut, or even President if she wants and that’s what REALLY matters. I wanted her to know the value of these amazing women who had gone against everything so she can now have everything.

"The Dove Sketches Beauty Scam" by TheLastPsych at The Last Psychiatrist:

Self esteem is sold to you as an inalienable right, not something to be earned; and if you don't have self-esteem it's because fake society made you feel bad about yourself. But fake society also made you feel good about yourself, it propped you up. The reason you got an A and not an R and believed it is because you actually believe you are an A kind of guy, Math, English, History, Science, PE, and Lunch notwithstanding. A, not R. But if everyone deserves it, it has no value. Which is why getting it is unsatisfying.

"An Open Letter to Pastors (A Non-Mom Speaks About Mother's Day)" by Amy Young at The Messy Middle:

A pastor asked all mothers to stand. On my immediate right, my mother stood and on my immediate left, a dear friend stood. I, a woman in her late 30s, sat. I don't know how others saw me, but I felt dehumanized, gutted as a woman. Real women stood, empty shells sat. I do not normally feel this way. I do not like feeling this way. I want no woman to ever feel this way in church again.

"Rules for Life" by Jenny Lawson at The Bloggess:

7. Critics aren’t automatically bullies and you’re doing yourself a disservice if you ignore all of them out of hand. That being said, it sucks to read shitty stuff about yourself so find an honest friend to read your criticism and tell you if it’s something worth listening to or if the critic is just a crazy fucking douche-canoe.

"Dieting Last Resorts" by Margaret Elysia Garcia at Girl Body Pride:

Once we broke up, I gained again. I noticed my aunt and uncle seemed to be both super slimmed down and hyper alert. My grandmother suggested I ask them the secret of their dieting success. My uncle wouldn’t tell me but his wife, a giantess, looked me straight in the eye and said, "Drugs. Hard drugs."

"Creative Rehab: 7 Myths About Creativity" by Andréa Balt at Rebelle Society:

You'd think it's innate — this ability to transcend the mundane and discover a second, more magnificent world within the one you've been taught to argue with. And maybe you do come with superpowers at birth but you lose them as your mind conquers your heart over time.

"I'm Coming From Where I Have Been" by Jenna Cole at That Wife:

I realize that this will be an opportunity for some to write me off as someone who wasn’t righteous enough and gave in to the natural man. I have accepted that this may be something some people may believe about me no matter what I say in my own defense. Living authentically and openly is more important to me than avoiding any malicious or untrue statements that might be made about me because of choices made about my lifestyle.

"Why is Park Korean?" by Rainbow Rowell at Rainbow:

I think the question is more about me than Park. It's — why did I make Park Korean? There aren't a lot of Asian boys in YA; the character calls attention to himself. Why would a white author write about an Asian guy?

Please come back and share good writing with us over the coming week to be featured on the next Five Star Friday. If you have read a really good piece on someone else's weblog, submit it by Thursday at midnight CST to have it featured on Five Star Friday.

And because you are a fan of finding good new writing on the internet:

• Subscribe — Subscribe to this website to keep up with us every week.
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Five Star Friday's 236th Edition Is Brought to You By Daniel H. Pink

This week's Five Star Friday is brought to you by the importance of longer form writing online, a Boston Marathon spectator, a call for more mindful communication, the effects of culturally ingrained white social advantage, knowing when to walk away, the value of storytelling, dealing with the darker emotions that come with breast cancer, a struggle with self-image, and Daniel H. Pink:


photo credit: CIPD

While complying can be an effective strategy for physical survival, it's a lousy one for personal fulfillment. Living a satisfying life requires more than simply meeting the demands of those in control.

     — Daniel H. Pink

Happy Friday!

"We Used to Speak In Essays" by Sarah Dopp at Dopp Juice:

Broadcasting distilled, emotional battle cries without background context to our entire Rolodexes is further polarizing us as a community. And aren't we polarized enough as it is?

I want us to speak in essays again, to connect compassionately over our differences, to listen, to be respectful, and to learn from each other. The fact that our audience has broadened to everyone we’ve ever met makes it that much more important to be real, human, and long-form about where we’re coming from and why we feel the way we do.

"When Is It Time to Walk Away?" by Jen Hatmaker at JenHatmaker.com:

There is a tipping point when the work becomes exhausting beyond measure, useless. You can't pour antidote into a vat of poison forever and expect it to transform into something safe, something healthy. In some cases, poison is poison, and the only sane answer is to move on.

"Quaker Mode" by Mike Monteiro (NSFW) at The Pastry Box Project:

As the world seems to be falling apart, and social media introduces a new level of cacophony of misinformation, speculation, and downright venomous bile — we should ask ourselves, is what I am about to say better than silence? Am I adding anything to what's already being said? And possibly most importantly, is my desire to say it keeping me from listening to what is already being said. Because waiting for your turn to talk is not the same as listening.

Have I actually improved the silence?

"Why Do You Write?" by Vikki Reich at Lesbian Family:

After the birth of my second child, I started blogging and, again, had no idea why I was putting words on a virtual page to be read by strangers (if at all) but I did it and I am still doing it seven years later.

But blogging changed me. It helped me realize that every piece of writing is a story unfolding, that my life is a story unfolding.

"First Impressions" by Ashley Austrew at Zebra Garden:

And then the tears are rolling down your cheeks, silent and warm, and you hate yourself for it. Your husband comes up to check on you, see how much longer you'll be, and you duck into the closet, pretend to be looking for something. You don’t want him to see because he wouldn't understand, he couldn't understand. How could he ever understand how something as simple as getting dressed can make a person cry?

"Boston Marathon Snapshots Take On New Meaning" by Lauren Crabbe at Digital Photography Review: Connect:

While it's not surprising that civilian photos are being used in an FBI investigation, the potential amount of raw footage under review may be unprecedented.

"The Sound of Startled Agony" by Lisa Boncheck Adams at LisaBAdams.com:

Perhaps I feel the written land of the upbeat is for others. My niche is here, in the agony of this disease. There is so much emphasis on "being positive" and all of that; I feel the compulsion to show the flip side, too.

"I'm Not Your 'Black Friend'" by Crystal Sykes at The Bold Italic:

The thing that is hardest to explain is that these jokes are coming from a position of privilege my white friends don't even realize they have. This social advantage is so ingrained in our culture that they aren't aware their comments are coming off the backs of centuries' worth of hardship and oppression. The tipping point for me was about two years ago, at a friend's house, when I was introduced as "The Black Friend." As my friend laughed off his statement, my heart dropped at this oversimplification of me as a person. I quickly realized that the joke was on me, and the punch line was my race.

Please come back and share good writing with us over the coming week to be featured on the next Five Star Friday. If you have read a really good piece on someone else's weblog, submit it by Thursday at midnight CST to have it featured on Five Star Friday.

And because you are a fan of finding good new writing on the internet:

• Subscribe — Subscribe to this website to keep up with us every week.
• Show your pride — Take one of our badges for your website and spread the word.